it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
