Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
