Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
