what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Randomize
