I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize
