I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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