There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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