The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Randomize
