That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
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