I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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