Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize