What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Randomize
