i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
