he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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