Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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