If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Just high enough for therapy.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
