too bad you live with your parents still
and you said cock pushups were impossible
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize