I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
