Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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