Acid is not a monday night drug
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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