so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
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