I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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