I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
