how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I would fuck him just for his dog
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
