I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
