what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
