we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
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