it wasn't lemon gatorade
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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