It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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