my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Randomize
