omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
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