The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
