I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
I just pynch a tree in the face
It's Friday. Sex?
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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