My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
