What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize