I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize