3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
