I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
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