wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
