WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
