I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
