forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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