What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Randomize
