Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
