Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
