I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Randomize