The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
my liver is dry heaving
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
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