your parents love me but you hate me
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
he was CRYING into my vagina
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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