mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
