I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
