can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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